15 Signs You’re With A Good Man

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(I saw this article from the Huffington Post and I just had to post it and get input from the “I Believe in Marriage” Community! Do you agree with this list? Is there anything you would add?)

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(Article from The Huffington Post)

1. A good man never lets you forget how much he loves you.

I cannot tell you how many conversations I have had with people who tell me that there is no affection in their relationship. The man in their life does not make them feel loved, wanted or appreciated. This is a profoundly important piece of the puzzle — a good man will always remind you how much you mean to him.

If someone truly loves you, you will know it and feel it. If they don’t, you’ll be wondering all the time if they do.

2. A good man always supports you.

Regardless of whether you want to go back to school after 20 years to get your Master’s degree, start a singing career or stay at home to raise a family, a good man will always support you and what you want out of your life. He will never discourage you or make you feel as though you can’t do what you set out to do. He will be beside you every step of the way, cheering on your victories and comforting you during your defeats.

3. A good man will inspire you.

This goes one step beyond supporting you, which can be more passive. To inspire someone takes effort both in how one lives their own life and how they encourage others to live theirs. A good man’s drive and ambition will rub off on you as he pursues his own passions.

4. A good man will work to gain your trust.

A good man will want you to be comfortable and confident in your relationship. The very cornerstone of this is being able to trust someone, and he will realize that. Without trust, there is no foundation for love or respect.

He will understand that trust is not just handed over to someone — it has to be earned, and then it has to be kept.

5. A good man will always make you feel beautiful.

He will understand that making you feel beautiful does not just mean saying the words to you. It will mean truly making you feel beautiful. In the way he looks at you, touches you and treats you. He will notice details when you put effort into your appearance and remind you how attractive he still finds you, even when you don’t.

A good man will understand that whether you are in your sweatpants on the couch or in your evening gown heading to a gala, when you love someone for who they truly are, everything about them becomes beautiful.

6. A good man will make you feel safe.

I have always said that I believe one of the best compliments a woman can give her partner is telling him that she feels safe around him. Regardless of how attracted she is to you or how funny she thinks you are or how much money you have, if a woman cannot sleep soundly by your side at night, none of it matters.

7. A good man does the little things.

Do you need a prescription filled, but have to stay late at work? Did you mention an art exhibit coming to town and he made plans to take you to see it? Regardless of how small certain things seem, he will understand they are really the big things that matter most.

(So what do you think so far? My favorite from this list is #4 because I too believe trust is earned and I think that it should be worked for on both sides! Which is your fav so far? Click HERE to read the full list!)

7 Often Overlooked Signs of a Successful Marriage

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7 Often Overlooked Signs of a Successful Marriage

By Robin May

A simple Google search for characteristics of a successful marriage will yield more than enough ideas on what it takes to make a marriage work. But while the different ideas on the ingredients needed to make a marriage work may be good, trying to cipher through all of it is more than a notion.

The truth is that marriage is a challenging terrain but one that can be navigated successfully…you just need a road map to help you. And it is up to you to decide what roadmap you are going to use.

As a mental health therapist, I’ve worked with many couples over the years, and I’ve seen the good and not so good. I’ve seen one person ‘fight’ for their marriage while the other one seemed disinterested in giving much effort at all. I’ve seen couples start counseling with little hope that they can make it work, but end up pleasantly surprised that they could reignite their spark.

I believe in marriage. Not because of my marriage. Not because of the union of couples I greatly admire. I believe in marriage because it is God’s institution. And He does all things well.

With that said, I believe there are 7 often overlooked characteristics that when incorporated by both partners can create a strong and long lasting romance. While the often discussed ingredients (trust, communication, friendship, etc.) are important, it is equally (if not more so) important that we push past the surface and identify other character traits that impact our relationship.

Ready? Here are the 7 Characteristics that point to a successful marriage:

  1. Self-Insight

It is very easy for us to see the challenges our spouse has and minimize how we contribute to the chaos in our marriage. But being able to admit your role in the challenges you and your spouse face, and being willing to do something about your role, will help to keep the relationship strong.

2.  Open to change

I know that once we hit a certain age, we become comfortable in the skin we are in. And rightfully so. But, being comfortable or confident in who you are does not discount the fact that we should all strive to become a better version of ourselves. Accepting that there may be areas where we can evolve will help our relationships stay on track.

 3.  Reasonableness

In order to truly merge two lives together requires that both parties use sound judgment in their interactions, decision making and communication. Being open to a different perspective, even when vastly different from your own will ensure both parties feel acknowledged and respected in the relationship.

4. Receptive to accountability

As adults we sometimes forget that we still need support and wise counsel from others. It is at times a thin line between protecting the privacy of your relationship and isolating. However, a healthy marriage is not a marriage that is independent of accountability. With that said, it is critical that you are careful as to who you trust to give you guidance.

5.  Properly prioritizing the relationship

Many of us make the mistake of paying attention to the urgent and ignoring what is important. Urgent matters often demand that we respond immediately and therefore we neglect the areas that may not be as demanding, but many times have a greater life impact. Couples in a healthy marriage don’t allow the demands of life to constantly suffocate the needs of their relationship, and they are willing to make the tough choices to realign if they get off track.

 6.  Intentional forgiveness

Because marriage consists of two human beings trying to become ‘one’, it is inevitable that we might unintentionally (or, if we are honest, maybe at times intentionally) hurt one another. Choosing to show grace in those moments, offer the gift of forgiveness and hit reset on the relationship, is the difference between a strong marriage and one that is bound for trouble.

7.  Embracing a higher standard

People of faith realize that their marriage is not just about them. It is a picture that represents God’s love for His church. Therefore, remembering that while you may not FEEL like being loving or you may not be THINKING positively about your spouse, your marriage is bigger than you. Making decisions based on God’s standards and not your own will help you do what you may not want to do to make your marriage work!